Al Franken is Funny?

I’m giving in Adrian.

Scientists at the Al Franken Center for Innovation in Fundraising Emails have been hounding me lately. They want me to try some Trumpian asks in these emails. They want to know if they work.

I didn’t like it, but they’ve worn me down. So here goes.

First is an ask in 140 characters. Tweet style. Not whole sentences. Your contrib will be AMAZING. Will you give? Thanks!

Next is ALL CAPS.

THIS GIVES URGENCY, AS IF WE NEED MORE. EVEN IF ALL YOU CAN GIVE IS $5 OR $10, THAT’LL MAKE A HUGE DIFFERENCE.

Next on the list is “greatly exaggerate the truth.” Hmm.

We have to raise $60,000 by the end of the month. If we don’t, the government will crumble, electricity will all go out at once, and the sky will be purple from here on out. Click a link and give before it’s too late!

If you've saved your payment information with ActBlue Express, your donation will go through immediately:

Express Donate: $5

Express Donate: $10

Express Donate: $25

Or donate another amount.

Ok. None of that will happen. We don’t need to add urgency this way.

The truth is we have some really urgent priorities to fight for. And Adrian -- we’ve been at this for a long time. We know how to win these battles.

So here’s the control ask: Help us reach our $60,000 goal by the deadline on February 28th and keep us on track this quarter. I want to keep Team Franken growing.

Thanks, Al

P.S.: There was one more Trumpian item on the list. [sigh] Here goes again: Team, we have the best emails. Really, they’re tremendous. Everyone else’s emails are just terrible. Ours are the best. Click here and give.

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Dear Al:

It's nice to get one of your ravings on a slow day and confirm the US Senate hires the mentally handicapped.  I can only imagine that you, unlike so many elected officials, hire those who think you are really witty instead of those who think you are really sexy.  You are neither.

I have been to several Federal and State elected folks offices and observed they are always filled with very well turned-out, young ladies who have infinite capacities to come up with ways to tell the boss how wonderful he is.  That, and election shenanigans are the only job security they have.

There is a far deeper, darker message behind all the fund raiser emails I get every day and it is that not only do you think money means victory in politics, but you apparently have been successful in using it to buy victory.  

I can suppose it costs a lot of money to pay off voter registrars not to take dead people off the voter rolls.  Some counties in several states have more registered Democrat voters than they do people living in the county!  California was a Republican state until the illegal aliens became 1/3 of our population. Immigration has become invasion. Now it is said many vote many times as a matter of course as we have no way of identifying them, by law!  Why do I have to show an ID to cash a check at my own bank, but not to vote?  I am not laughing and wonder why anyone thinks Al Franken is funny.

Adrian Vance