Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez - A Gift

Rep. Alexandri Ocasio-Cortez

The Democrat's greatest gift to the Republicans is Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez who produces wonderful quotes proving she is a dingbat and now a new line of jokes, one of which we use for a big finish, but before that let us offer some of her greater quotes:

      "Congressional Duties Keeping Her Out Of Yoga Class"
 
"New York’s Democratic Congresswoman-elect Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is complaining about her political career keeping her out of yoga class and she hasn’t even started working yet.

Ocasio-Cortez lamented on social media about missing out on yoga classes, eating too much fast food, and sometimes falling asleep with her makeup on thanks to her new job duties as a Congresswoman. 

Perhaps someone should tell her she doesn’t begin working officially until January 3rd, 2019 when she’s sworn in.  Up to that point she is simply citizen Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.

Ocasio-Cortez also decided to take a week off from work, apparently not realizing work has not started and she is not yet in office!  That she is living in her own bubble, insulated from reality indicates this is going to be a lot of fun for Republicans. 

"Huh?"  She is asking for "Self care tips?"  This young lady is going to be in the top level of our elected government offices?  Is this now or will it turn out to be another failure of "our democracy?"  Never forget when Democrats speak of "our democracy" in unctuous tones, they are not talking about America.  They are talking about the Democratic Party, which is neither democratic or a real political party.  It is an autocratic, despotic to the point of criminality, organization based on power, primarily from money, and as corrupt as it can be.  Consider everything since the election of FDR on.  Meanwhile back at Ms. Ocasio-Cortez.

“Before the campaign, I used to practice yoga [three-to-four times per week], eat nutritiously, read and write for leisure,” Ocasio-Cortez wrote on Instagram. “As soon as everything kicked up, that all went out the window. I went from doing yoga and making wild rice and salmon dinners to eating fast food for dinner and falling asleep in my jeans and makeup.”

"I’m taking a few days to take care of myself before what is sure to be an eventful term.  For working people, immigrants and the poor, self-care is political - not because we want it to be, but bc of the inevitable shaming of someone doing a face mask while financially stressed."  (OMG!)

Not too full of herself which makes her great fodder for joke writers. To wit:

"Jack, a handsome man, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 pm. He sat down next to Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez at the bar and stared up at the TV as the 10:00 news came on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump.
 
Alexandria looked at Jack and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"
Jack says, "You know what, I bet he will." Alexandria replied, "Well, I bet he won't." Jack placed $30 on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as she placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death. She was very upset and handed her $30 to Jack, saying, "Fair's fair... Here's your money."
 
Jack replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 o'clock news and knew he would jump."
 
Alexandria replied, "I did too; but I didn't think he'd do it again."
 
Jack took the money. Alexandria went back to work at the US Congress."  God save America!

Adrian Vance

Thanks to John Keady for the contributed joke.