Note From A Big Egg Man

Dear Activist, I ran the numbers: in California, there are SEVEN Congressional seats that Hillary Clinton WON in 2016, which are currently represented by Republicans in Congress. Winning all those seats would mean taking almost a THIRD of what we need to take back the House — all here in the Golden State. Sign the petition: Californians will elect Democrats in 2018 to fight the Trump agenda and turn these seats from Red to Blue. Sign NOW In 2014 and 2016, I ran for Congress in one of those seats. While we fell just short of victory, I learned a heck of a lot on the way. Now as Donald Trump threatens to upend the very fabric of what makes our country great, I’m doing my part to join the resistance. I’m taking what I learned on the campaign trail to help others succeed. That’s why I’m announcing the creation of a new organization: RED TO BLUE CALIFORNIA. With your help, we will turn Red to Blue California into a double-edged sword to strike down Republicans throughout the red areas of our state. One edge of the sword will be to defeat those SEVEN REPUBLICANS representing Democratic Congressional seats. The sword’s other edge will focus on electing local Democratic leaders to build our bench of future progressive champions. Add your name to join Red to Blue California and commit to help flip these seven with your fellow Californians. ADD YOUR NAME Michael Eggman ------------------------------ Dear Mr. Eggman: You must be smoking some of that newly legalized Marijuana Jerry Brown has authorized in spite of the fact that it is still a "Class I Narcotic."  Do you know what this means if Federal agents bust through your door some evening and find a big stash of Jipijapa Gold in your pantry?  They can take your property down to your socks and briefs.  Going to court and getting it back will cost between $40,000 and $200,000 depending on your attorney and that is only the beginning of your legal problems. If you have certification for any profession or business you will lose that and looking at another round with a six figure lawyer, and we don't mean a fat gal. You will be unemployable down to the hamburger flipper class and may even have a hard time getting a job cutting lawns or cleaning toilets.  Your residence will be a broken down "Bates Motel" or a car in the woods where bears and lions are the least of your worries. Your life is over because you listened to Jerry Brown, Governor Moobeam, Eggman. Adrian Vance