The Secret to a Long Life?

A doctor while on a morning walk, noticed the very elderly lady pictured above. She was sitting on her front step smoking a cigar.  He walked up to her and said, "I couldn't help but notice how happy and content you look! What is your secret?"

She said, "I smoke ten cigars a day. Before I go to bed, I smoke a big pot joint. Apart from that, I drink a whole bottle of Jack Daniels every week, and eat only junk food. On weekends, I pop pills and have sex. I don't exercise at all.

Visions of great wealth flashed in the physician's mind:  He could put this in a book and clean up like Bill McKibbons and all the authors of promoting "Organic food," "Free Range" and "Hormone Free" livestock,  No "Genetically Modified" plants, animals or other such improved, disease free and resistant lifeforms. Nothing from "corporate farms," or those that use fertilizer even though it is only replacing substances that have washed out of the soil by eons of rain, but never let facts shape your argument.  Buy those "anti-everything" books and net Bill McKibbons, and other such, another million or two. On that vision the virtually trembling doctor went for the final fact he needed to complete his plan for wealth, fame and fortune.  He asked:

"That is absolutely amazing! How old are you?"

"Forty," she replied.

The physician was himself in need of medical attention as his great dream and diabolical scheme vanished in a single word.  He had not discovered the secret to a long life.

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From a submission by Dr. James Rust, Ph.D. Physics.